Guide Price: $300

## **MID-SUMMER NIGHTS AREN’T FOR DREAMING, BABES—THEY’RE FOR DOMINATING. 💃🔥
YOUR “COVETABLE LOOKS”? THEY’RE WEAK SAUCE. I’LL SHOW YOU HOW TO WEAR WAR PAINT.**

**LISTEN UP, BASIC BEACHES AND WANNABE IT-GIRLS:**
You’re scrolling through *another* “summer lookbook” full of floral sundresses and straw hats? **PATHETIC.** You think “jet set” means airport pajamas and messy buns? **EMBARRASSING.**
**WAKE THE F*CK UP.** The summer night isn’t a vibe—**IT’S A BATTLEFIELD.** And while the peasants sip rosé in Target rompers, **REAL SLAYLEBRITY QUEENS STRAP IN FOR COMBAT.**

—

### **THE JET-SET BABE MANIFESTO: NO SUNBURNS, ONLY SLAYAGE. ☠️**
**FORGET “CUTE.” FORGET “TRENDY.” YOU’RE HUNTING SCALPS.**
1. **THE BODYSUIT: YOUR SECOND SKIN OF SEDUCTION 🐍**
– **Not fabric.** *Liquid obsidian.* Cut to the navel. Backless. Clinging like a threat.
– **Pair it with:** Razor-sharp leather pants that scream *“I’ll cut you, then kiss the wound.”*
– **Basic b*tch error:** Bikini tops and denim shorts. **YOU LOOK LIKE A TOURIST.**

2. **THE DRESS: ARCHITECTURE OF GODDESS WARFARE 👑**
– **Sculpted satin.** One leg slit to heaven. Neckline plunging to hell. Color? **BLOOD RUBY** or **MIDNIGHT ASSASSIN BLACK.**
– **Accessorize:** 24k gold cuffs thick enough to bludgeon a hater. Stilettos sharpened to ice-pick precision.
– **Peasant alert:** Flowy maxi dresses? **YOU MIGHT AS WELL WEAR A TENT.**

3. **THE HAIR: CROWN OF CHAOS 👸💥**
– **Sleeked-back venom slick?** For boardroom takeovers before the club.
**Volcanic curls?** For when you want sweat to drip down your enemies’ spines.
– **Basic crime:** Beach waves. **YAWN.** The ocean called—it wants its mediocrity back.

—

### **YOUR WEAPONS OF MASS SEDUCTION: 🔫**
– **PERFUME:** Not “sweet.” **SMOKE, SULFUR, AND STOLEN AMBER.** Make him choke on your aura.
– **JEWELRY:** Diamonds are for wives. **YOU WEAR PLATINUM SERPENTS AND EYE OF SAURON STONES.**
– **ATTITUDE:** Your walk isn’t a strut—**IT’S A TERRITORY CLAIM.** Your smile isn’t friendly—**IT’S A TRAP DOOR.**

—

### **HOW TO GET THE LOOK? STOP SHOPPING. START RAIDING. 🏴‍☠️**
– **DON’T BUY:** From Zara, H&M, or any mall cesspool. **YOU’RE NOT A DISCOUNT HUNTER.**
– **DO:** Storm the ateliers. Demand custom. Threaten designers with extinction if they fail you.
– **Balenciaga?** For your *warm-ups.*
– **Versace?** For *grocery runs.*
– **SAINT LAURENT?** **NOW WE’RE TALKING WAR.**

**PRICE TAGS? IRRELEVANT.
YOUR POWER? NON-NEGOTIABLE.**

—

### **WHY THE “SUMMER GIRL” AESTHETIC IS A DEATH SENTENCE: ☀️⚰️**
– **Florals?** **FUNERAL SHROUDS FOR AMBITION.**
– **Pastels?** **THE COLOR OF SURRENDER.**
– **Espadrilles?** **FLOOR MOP DISGUISED AS SHOES.**

**YOU AREN’T HERE TO BLEND IN WITH PALM TREES.
YOU’RE HERE TO BURN THEM DOWN.**

—

### **THE AFTER-DARK RITUAL: 💄**
1. **SKIN:** Not “dewy.” **LUBRICATED WEAPRY.** Sweep on highlighter like you’re greasing a fighter jet.
2. **EYES:** Not “smoky.” **NAPALM SUNSETS.** Gold foil. Liquid liner sharp enough to slit egos.
3. **LIPS:** Not “nude.” **VAMPIRE’S LAST MEAL.** Matte crimson. Apply like you’re signing a death warrant.

—

### **TO THE HATERS WHISPERING “OVERTHINKING FASHION”:** 🐑
**SILENCE, PEASANT.**
– *Your* “look”: Thrifted denim and hope.
– **HER LOOK:** **A PSYCHOLOGICAL TACTIC.**
She doesn’t wear clothes—**SHE DEPLOYS THEM.**

**THIS ISN’T STYLE.
IT’S PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE IN SILK.**

—

### **THE VERDICT: 👇**
**YOU HAVE TWO OPTIONS:**
1. **Slay the summer night like a conquistadora:**
– Sculpt the body.
– Commission the armor.
– Poison the air with your presence.
2. **Rot in basicness:**
– Wear florals.
– Fade into resort wallpaper.
– Watch *HER* own the room.

> **“They ask: *‘Who are you wearing?’*
> I whisper: *‘THE TEARS OF MY ENEMIES.’”**
> **— YOUR FUTURE SELF, LAUGHING FROM HER THRONE**

—

**SHARE IF YOU’RE READY TO INCINERATE THE COMPETITION.
SHARE IF YOUR SUMMER DRESS CODE IS “FEAR ME.”
SHARE TO ANNOUNCE: THE NIGHT BELONGS TO THE RUTHLESS.
#JetSetAssassin #MidSummerMassacre #FashionIsViolence**

**→ P.S. SEE A GIRL WEARING SANDALS? PITY HER. THEN CRUSH HER. 🔥👠**

Guide Price: $300

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