**LAVO LONDON JUST DROPPED A CULINARY NUCLEAR BOMB — AND YOUR BANK ACCOUNT ISN’T READY**
Let’s cut through the noise like a diamond-studded oyster knife slicing through a Gillardeau.
You think you’ve seen luxury brunch? You think you’ve *done* bottomless?
**You haven’t.**
Not until you’ve sat in the velvet-lined, gold-accented, Mayfair-charged war room that is **Lavo London**—where the champagne flows like confidence, the lobster stacks like your net worth should, and the oysters? Oh, the oysters arrive faster than your excuses disappear.
This isn’t brunch.
This is **culinary warfare**—and Lavo just declared total domination.
—
### £95. That’s It. For *Unlimited* Luxury.
Now, the broke boys in the comments will whine: *“Ninety-five pounds?! For brunch?!”*
Yeah, sure—**if you’re still pricing life in subway tokens and sad meal prep.**
But if you operate in the stratosphere where time is rarer than truffles and flavor is non-negotiable?
Then £95 isn’t a price.
It’s a **steal**.
Because here’s what you’re really getting:
– **Bottomless lobster**—not the sad, pre-frozen nonsense some “luxury” spots serve like it’s a favor. We’re talking meaty, butter-drenched, claw-cracking, Instagram-flashing **Maine lobster**, served hot, fresh, and *as often as you can lift your fork*.
– **Oysters on infinite rotation**—plump, icy, briny perfection. Slurp one, signal the server, another dozen appears like you just summoned Poseidon’s butler.
– **Antipasti that would make Nonna weep with pride**—cured meats sliced thinner than your last relationship, burrata so creamy it should come with a warning label, marinated artichokes that taste like they were plucked from a Tuscan dream.
– **Grilled meats** that don’t play. Lamb chops. Beef medallions. Chicken so tender it surrenders before you even chew.
– And desserts? **Forget moderation.** Tiramisu that floats. Panna cotta that jiggles like a secret. Chocolate so rich it should require a tax audit.
All of it. **Unlimited.**
And paired with a drink—Aperol spritz, mimosa, espresso martini, or if you’re feeling dangerous, a glass of something that costs more than your rent.
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### This Isn’t Just Food—It’s a Power Move
Let’s be brutally honest:
Most “bottomless brunches” are psychological traps.
You pay £50, get three soggy croissants and a lukewarm Prosecco that tastes like regret, and leave hungrier than when you arrived.
**Lavo doesn’t play that game.**
This is **high-octane indulgence** engineered for those who’ve already won.
It’s not about *filling your stomach*—it’s about **asserting dominance over mediocrity**.
You don’t go to Lavo to eat.
You go to **remind yourself—and everyone in that room—that you operate on a different frequency.**
The kind where luxury isn’t a splurge.
It’s your **baseline**.
—
### The Vibe? Pure Elite Theater
Mayfair isn’t just a postcode—it’s a **state of mind**.
And Lavo? It’s the throne room.
Low lighting. Deep booths. Staff who move like ninjas with sommelier certifications.
Music that hums just loud enough to drown out the sound of your old life crumbling behind you.
This is where deals are sealed between bites of lobster.
Where influencers become icons over oyster towers.
Where you don’t just *show up*—you **arrive**.
And if you’re smart? You book the **corner booth**.
Because power doesn’t sit in the middle.
It **owns the room**.
—
### Final Truth: You Either Level Up—Or You Starve in Silence
Look—Lavo’s bottomless brunch isn’t for everyone.
It’s for the **1% of the 1%** who understand that **excellence is non-negotiable**, even at 11 a.m. on a Sunday.
£95?
You could blow that on three Ubers, a sad salad, and a therapy session about your “unfulfilled potential.”
Or—you could **invest it in an experience that reprograms your standard for greatness**.
Your call.
But while you’re debating, I’ll be back at Lavo—
fork in one hand, empire in the other,
watching the world try to catch up.
**Welcome to the top. The food’s better here.**
📍 Lavo London | Mayfair
💸 £95 pp (includes drink)
🔥 Bottomless lobster. Bottomless oysters. Bottomless power.
**Book it. Devour it. Become untouchable.**
#LavoLondon #BillionaireBrunch #LobsterOnLoop #OystersWithoutLimits #MayfairMafia #EatLikeYouOwnTheWorld #NoMoreNormieMeals #JetSetBabeApproved #UnlimitedPowerUnlimitedFood
LOCATION
📍 LAVO, Bond Street Station
30 Marylebone Ln, London W1U 2DR
CONTACTS
020 7309 9700
Most people budget for brunch. I budget for empires… and unlimited lobster.** #LavoLondon
If your bottomless brunch doesn’t come with oysters on speed dial, are you even winning? #BoujeeOnABudget
£95 for infinite lobster, oysters, and Italian decadence? That’s not a meal—that’s a hostile takeover of mediocrity.
They said eat like a Slaylebrity king. So I went to Lavo and ordered my third lobster tower before noon #MayfairMafia
Normal people count calories. Winners count how many oysters they can crush before the DJ drops #BottomlessPower
This isn’t brunch. It’s a luxury arms race—and I came fully loaded #LavoLondon
You: I can’t afford it. Me: *sips Aperol, signals for another dozen oysters* The universe: She already did**
When your Sunday FOMO is real… because everyone else is stuck in line at Pret while you’re in Mayfair with lobster butter on your soul
Unlimited food? Sure. Unlimited confidence? That’s the real bottomless menu at Lavo #EatLikeYouOwnIt
Some chase clout. I chase truffle burrata and ice-cold Gillardeau oysters at 11 a.m. #JetSetBabeApproved
11. £95 isn’t expensive when your ROI is: – 3 lobsters – 24 oysters – 1 existential crisis for your broke mindset
They serve dreams at Lavo. …It just so happens they’re wrapped in garlic butter and served on chilled marble #LavoLondon
