Concierge Price: $5000
**The RICHEST BITCHES on Earth Just Got a New Addiction… (It’s Not Cocaine. It’s Cookies.)**
Listen up, peasants and paper-chasers. Slay Billionaire concierge here, and no, I’m not dead—just busy counting my 8th Lamborghini this week while sipping espresso from a mug made of pure Baltic amber. But today, we’re talking about something EVEN RICHER than my monthly electric bill: **Billionaire Wife Luxe Fashion Cookies**.
You heard me right. Cookies. But not the kind your broke aunt Diane burns in her oven while crying about her student loans. These are the **24-carat gold-plated, diamond-dust-sprinkled, Gucci-logo-embossed cookies** that are currently setting the world on fire. And they’re ONLY available to **Slay Club World VIP Members**. So unless your net worth has a comma in it, close this tab. You’re not ready.
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### **Let’s Get One Thing Straight: This Ain’t a Cookie. It’s a STATUS SYMBOL.**
You think rich people eat regular food? No, brother. They snack on **STATUS**. These cookies are baked by a team of ex-NASA scientists and Balenciaga designers in a secret lab under Dubai’s tallest gold-plated skyscraper. Each bite is infused with the tears of struggling influencers and the screams of jealous haters.
Inside every box: **24 exclusive fashion-themed cookies**, each one a masterpiece. Rock a **Chanel No.5-shaped cookie** dipped in edible platinum. Chomp a **Rolex watch cookie** with gears made of dark chocolate. Or flex your new **Birkin bag cookie** filled with liquid gold caramel. These aren’t desserts—they’re **WEAPONIZED LUXURY**.
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### **Why Are These Cookies Going VIRAL?**
Because the world is full of broke, basic bitches who want to feel what it’s like to be RICH AF. But here’s the tea:
– **They’re delivered WORLDWIDE** (even to your mom’s trailer park in Ohio).
– **Each cookie is Instagram-certified** (filters optional, but you’ll look 10x richer in Stories).
– **They taste like winning** (because they’re made with 24k gold flakes imported from my personal mine in Transylvania).
And NO, you can’t buy them on Amazon. This ain’t Jeff Bezos’ diet. You want these? Join the **Slay Club** or keep eating Dollar Tree granola while crying into your cat’s water bowl.
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### **What’s Inside the 24k Gold-Flecked Box?**
Let me break this down for you retards who still think “fashion” is a H&M coupon:
1. **The “I’m Not Rich, I’m *Billionaire Adjacent*” Cookie** – A gold-leafed cronut shaped like a private jet.
2. **The “Slay or Get Off the L Train” Cookie** – A stiletto boot filled with red velvet rage.
3. **The “Net Worth Over Haircut” Cookie”** – A diamond-encrusted crypto skull (tastes like Lambos).
…And 21 more designs so fire, Gigi Hadid canceled her Victoria’s Secret comeback to eat them.
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### **How to Unlock the Golden Cookie Vault**
You gotta be VIP. And VIP means:
– Paying $150,000 a year in Bitcoin to join the **Slay Club** (worth it just for the Discord emojis).
– Having a bank account balance that makes your accountant blush.
– Owning at least 3 properties OR a NFT that isn’t a cartoon ape.
Once you’re in? Contact your assigned concierge via telegram to “ORDER COOKIES” and watch your FedEx driver cry tears of jealousy when he sees the return address is from my private jet’s kitchen.
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### **The Haters Are Losing Their Minds…**
*“Bro, it’s just a cookie.”*
— Said every broke bitch who’s never tasted the sweet nectar of victory.
*“Why would anyone pay $5000 for a cookie?”*
— Said your mom, right before she ate her 10th Weight Watchers bar this week.
Let’s address the elephant in the room: Yes, these cookies are more expensive than your rent. But here’s the crux: **Rich people don’t pay rent**. They pay homage to their own greatness. And if you can’t afford these, guess what? You’re not a billionaire. You’re just a wannabe with a coupon code addiction.
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### **Final Warning to the Jealous Masses:**
You can keep baking your sad little oatmeal raisin dreams in your mom’s basement…
**OR**
You can join the Slay Club, grab these cookies while they’re hot, and post a TikTok of you biting into an edible Prada logo while your broke friends watch in silent agony.
The choice is yours. But remember:
**You’re either sipping champagne while your cookies drop globally, or you’re crying into a regular box of Chips Ahoy.**
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**CLICK THE LINK. JOIN THE SLAY CLUB. GET COOKIES THAT TASTE LIKE VICTORY.**
*P.S. If you’re reading this and still poor, don’t worry. My next blog’s called “How to Marry Rich: A Guide for Desperate Gold Diggers.” Stay tuned.* 🚀🍪
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*Disclaimer: Cookies may cause spontaneous yachting, unwanted paparazzi attention, and jealousy-induced fainting in commoners. Not responsible for the emotional trauma of your broke ex.*
Concierge Price: $10000
Includes complimentary worldwide shipping
Slay Concierge Purchase note
This listing information is reserved exclusively for GOLD PLUS VIP MEMBERS. CLICK HERE TO BECOME A MEMBER
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