**BILLIONAIRE WIFE AVOCADO TOAST: IF YOU’RE STILL EATING BASIC AVOCADO TOAST, YOU’RE ALREADY DEAD** 💸🔥

Listen up, peasants. While you’re out here smashing sad avocados onto burnt bread like a broke college student, REAL elites are engineering avocado toast that costs more than your rent. This isn’t food—it’s a **power move**. And if you think I’m wasting my time teaching you this? Wrong. I’m exposing the WEAKNESS of your basic brunch game.

### STEP 1: BURN WEAKNESS (ROAST THOSE BEETS) 🩸🔥
**Losers** buy pre-packaged hummus. **Winners** *invent* hummus that looks like it belongs in a Michelin-starred art gallery.

– ***What you’ll need***:
– 2 blood-red beets (organic, because poverty is a choice)
– 1 tbsp balsamic glaze (the kind that costs more than your self-esteem)
– 2 tbsp port wine (drink the rest of the bottle—you’ll need courage)
– 1 tsp smoked paprika (weaklings use “regular” paprika)

***How to dominate***:
1. **Roast the beets at 400°F until they’re softer than your excuses** (≈1 hour).
2. Peel ’em, blend ’em with balsamic, port wine, and paprika until smoother than your escape plan from the Matrix.

—

### STEP 2: CRUSH CHICKPEAS LIKE YOUR COMPETITION 🦵💥
**Basic hummus** is for yoga moms. **Billionaire hummus** requires *war tactics*.

– ***What you’ll need***:
– 1 can chickpeas (drained, because liquidity matters)
– 3 garlic cloves (minced—no pre-chopped garbage)
– 1 tbsp tahini (pronounced “tah-HEE-nee”, peasants)
– 1 lemon (juiced, like your bank account after this recipe)

***How to dominate***:
1. **Sauté chickpeas in olive oil until they’re golden—like your Rolex**. Add garlic, cumin, and a pinch of cayenne (weakness repellent).
2. Toss those chickpeas into a blender with your beetroot puree, tahini, lemon juice, and a **fistful of ice** (trust me—it’s what separates chefs from meal-preppers). Blend until it’s richer than your future.

—

### STEP 3: BUILD YOUR AVOCADO THRONE 🥑👑
**Avocado “roses”** are for Instagram influencers. **Avocado SPIRAL-S**? That’s for **queens who own airports**.

– ***What you’ll need***:
– 1 ripe avocado (if it’s not buttery, throw it at your haters)
– 1 knife sharper than your mindset
– Himalayan pink salt (because table salt is for prisoners)

***How to dominate***:
1. Slice the avocado into paper-thin strips—**precision is power**.
2. Arrange the slices into a vicious **SPIRAL-S SHAPE** (think: the serpent from the Garden of Eden, but make it bougie).

—

### STEP 4: ASSEMBLE YOUR EMPIRE 🧱💍
**Weaklings** stack ingredients. **Legends** architect *experiences*.

– ***What you’ll need***:
– Sourdough bread (artisan, gluten-free, or don’t bother)
– Microgreens (aka “poor people parsley”)
– Edible gold flakes (optional, but poverty is a mindset)

***How to dominate***:
1. **Char the sourdough** until it’s blackened at the edges—like your soul after reading this post.
2. Smear the beetroot hummus like you’re signing a divorce settlement.
3. Crown it with your avocado SPIRAL-S.
4. Garnish with microgreens and gold flakes. **Stare at it. This is what SUCCESS tastes like.**

—

### WHY THIS MATTERS 🚨💀
The world is divided into two types of people:
1. **Those who eat avocado toast** (broke, weak, destined to rent forever).
2. **Those who ENGINEER avocado toast** (own yachts, crush enemies, laugh at inflation).

This isn’t a recipe—it’s a **philosophy**. Every bite screams: *“I don’t compete. I redefine the game.”*

### BOTTOM LINE 🔥
If you’re still eating basic avocado toast, you’re not a person—you’re a **WARNING LABEL**. Upgrade your life, or starve in silence.

**-SLAY LIFESTYLE**

*P.S. My culinary masterclass* ***Billionaire Bites*** *drops soon. You’ll learn to cook like a warlord or die trying. COMMENT “TOP SLAYLEBRITY” then subscribe to my billionaire club for early access—or keep burning toast. I don’t care.* 💀👨🍳🔥

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