Guide Price: $300 – $2500
**WHY ARE YOU LOSERS SIMPING OVER LE CRUESET? LET’S TALK ABOUT YOUR BROKEN BRAINS.**
Listen up, peasants. Let me drop some Top Slay Lifestyle truth bombs on why you’re all foaming at the mouth over a *$350 pot* like it’s the Second Coming of Christ. You saw Meghan Markle—sorry, *Meghan Sussex*—flaunting her cookware on Netflix, and suddenly your tiny minds imploded. “Oh my GOD, a RICH PRINCESS owns EXPENSIVE PANS?!” *Shocking.* Next you’ll tell me water’s wet and Bugattis cost more than Camrys.
**Let’s break this down like I’m explaining it to a toddler with a TikTok attention span.**
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### **1. YOU’RE MAD A RICH PERSON OWNS NICE THINGS? WAKE UP, CLOWNS.**
First off, you’re losing your minds because a woman who *married into royalty* and lives in a mansion owns… *checks notes*… a *Le Creuset braiser*? What did you expect? Dollar Store cookware? A rusty skillet she found in a dumpster?
OF COURSE SHE HAS EXPENSIVE PANS. SHE’S A MILLIONAIRE.
This is like getting shocked that Jay-Z owns a private jet. Rich people buy nice things. That’s the whole point of being rich. But you keyboard warriors act like she’s committing war crimes because her Dutch oven costs more than your rent. Get a grip.
And for the record—Le Creuset isn’t even that expensive. You can buy a piece for $350. That’s *pocket change* for anyone with a side hustle stronger than your grandma’s Wi-Fi password. If you’re crying about this, you’re either broke, jealous, or both. Fix your life.
—
### **2. LE CRUESET IS MID. YOU’RE JUST EASY MARKS FOR MARKETING.**
Let’s cut the crap. Le Creuset is the *Tesla* of cookware—overhyped, overpriced, and owned by every basic NPC who thinks they’re “luxurious” because they spent a paycheck on a pastel-colored pot.
You know what’s a REAL flex? **Ruffoni Historia Disney© Hammered Copper Ultimate 9-Piece Cookware Set.** That’s thousands of dollars of pure dominance. It’s the Bugatti Chiron of pans. It screams, “I could buy your soul, your car, and your entire lineage with the change in my couch.”
But no—you’re out here salivating over *pink petal braisers* like they’re made of unicorn tears. Newsflash: Le Creuset is for people who want to *look* rich, not *be* rich. Real kings cook with copper that costs more than your entire kitchen.
—
### **3. YOU’RE ALL JUST CLOWNS IN THE CIRCUS OF CONSUMERISM**
Why do you care what cookware a celebrity uses? Because you’re addicted to the dopamine hit of fake outrage. The woke mob needs something to hate, and Meghan’s pans are this week’s target. Next week it’ll be her shoelaces.
You’re simping for Le Creuset because Instagram told you to. Because influencers—who’ve never seared a steak in their lives—post aesthetic kitchen photos to sell you a fantasy. You don’t want the pan; you want the *validation*. You want to feel like you’re part of the “elite” while you microwave ramen in your studio apartment.
Pathetic.
—
### **4. HERE’S THE BOTTOM LINE, BROKIES**
If you’re triggered by a rich person owning nice things, you’re admitting you’ll never have nice things yourself. Winners don’t whine—they *win*. They buy the Ruffoni set, the mansion, and the private jet, then laugh at peasants arguing over enameled cast iron.
Le Creuset isn’t the problem. *You* are. Your obsession with clout-chasing, your envy, your refusal to grind harder than the guy next to you.
So shut up about Meghan’s cookware. Go make money. Buy the extravagant pans. And when you do, tag me—I’ll respect the hustle. Until then? You’re just noise.
**– The Real Top Slaylebrity **
*(Cooking steak in a Ruffoni copper skillet you can’t afford.)*
—
**PS**: The pink petal braiser *is* kinda fire. But if you’re not upgrading to copper, you’re still a peasant. Stay mad.
Guide Price: $300 – $2500
BUY Signature edition LE CREUSET NOW
WHY ARE YOU LOSERS SIMPING OVER LE CRUESET? LET’S TALK ABOUT YOUR BROKEN BRAINS
You’re all foaming at the mouth over a *$350 pot* like it’s the Second Coming of Christ.
You saw Meghan Markle—sorry, *Meghan Sussex*—flaunting her cookware on Netflix, and suddenly your tiny minds imploded. ‘Oh my GOD, a RICH PRINCESS owns EXPENSIVE PANS?!’ *Shocking.* Next you’ll tell me water’s wet and Bugattis cost more than Camrys.
YOU’RE MAD A RICH PERSON OWNS NICE THINGS? WAKE UP, CLOWNS
OF COURSE SHE HAS EXPENSIVE PANS. SHE’S A MILLIONAIRE. What did you expect? Dollar Store cookware? A rusty skillet she found in a dumpster?
Le Creuset is for people who want to *look* rich, not *be* rich. Real kings cook with copper that costs more than your entire kitchen.
Le Creuset is the *Tesla* of cookware—overhyped, overpriced, and owned by every basic NPC who thinks they’re ‘luxurious’ because they spent a paycheck on a pastel-colored pot. You know what’s a REAL flex? **Ruffoni Historia Disney Hammered Copper Ultimate 9-Piece Cookware Set.
That’s thousands of dollars of pure dominance. It’s the Bugatti Chiron of pans. It screams, ‘I could buy your soul, your car, and your entire lineage with the change in my couch.’ You don’t want the pan; you want the *validation*. You want to feel like you’re part of the “elite” while you microwave ramen in your studio apartment. Pathetic.
**PS**: The pink petal braiser *is* kinda fire....But if you’re not upgrading to copper, you’re still a peasant. Stay mad.
