**Remembering My Dear Friend Emille Aalintah: The Power of Connection in Times of Loss**

Let me tell you something right now—life is brutal. It doesn’t care about your plans, your dreams, or the people you love. One day, someone’s here lighting up your world, and the next? Gone. Just like that. No warning. No second chances. That’s what happened with my dear friend Emille Aalintah. And today, I met her sister. Let me tell you why this matters—and why it should matter to *you*.

—

### **The Weight of Grief**
Grief isn’t something you “get over.” You don’t wake up one morning after losing someone close and say, “Ah, yes, all better now!” No. Grief lingers. It sits on your chest like a boulder, crushing you when you least expect it. But here’s the thing most people don’t talk about: grief can also be eased. Not erased—but lightened. And sometimes, all it takes is another human being showing up.

Today, Emille’s sister came to visit me at my home. We talked for hours. About Emille. About life. About everything she left behind and everything we’re still trying to figure out without her. When she left, she sent me a message that hit me harder than any punch ever could:

*”Thank you so much for the lovely visit to your home. It helped ease some of the pain I feel over Emille’s loss but also calmed me down knowing the work ahead.”*

Do you see that? Do you feel the weight of those words? She said two things there that stuck with me:
1. **“It helped ease some of the pain.”**
2. **“Knowing the work ahead.”**

Let’s break these down because they’re more important than you might think.

—

### **Easing the Pain**
Here’s the truth: when someone dies, the void they leave behind doesn’t fill easily—if ever. But what *can* happen is that the sharp edges of grief does just enough to let you breathe again. Sometimes, all it takes is someone reaching out. Someone saying, “I remember them too.” Or, “They mattered to me too.”

When Emille’s sister walked into my house today, I didn’t have some grand plan. I wasn’t going to “fix” anything. All I did was open the door, offer her a seat, and listen. I shared stories about Emille—the good ones, the funny ones, the ones that made us laugh until our stomachs hurt. And guess what? For a few moments, the heaviness lifted. Not completely, but enough. Enough to remind her (and me) that even though Emille is gone, her impact lives on. Her memory lives on. *She* lives on—in us.

That’s the power of connection. Of showing up. Of not letting fear or awkwardness keep you from doing the right thing. Because trust me, no one remembers the clumsy words you stumbled through when you showed up for them in their darkest hour. What they remember is that you showed up at all.

—

### **Knowing the Work Ahead**
Now, let’s talk about the second part of her message: “knowing the work ahead.” This is where things get real. Grief isn’t just an emotional burden—it’s a task list. Funeral arrangements. Sorting through belongings. Figuring out how to move forward while carrying the weight of what’s been lost. It’s exhausting. Overwhelming. And lonely as hell if you try to do it alone.

But here’s the kicker: you don’t have to do it alone. None of us do. Humans are wired for community. We’re built to lean on each other. Yet too often, we sit back and wait for someone else to step up. We think, “Someone else will call,” or “They probably already have support.” Bullsh*t. Stop waiting. If you know someone who’s grieving, pick up the phone. Send a text. Show up at their door with food or flowers or just yourself. Don’t overthink it. Just show up.

Because here’s the reality: every single action you take—even the smallest ones—makes a difference. Bringing coffee to someone who hasn’t slept in days? Huge. Offering to help clean out a closet full of memories? Massive. Simply sitting with them in silence because they don’t want to talk? Life-changing. These aren’t big gestures; they’re basic acts of humanity. But they mean everything to someone drowning in loss.

—

### **What Would Emille Say?**
If Emille were here right now, she’d probably smack me upside the head for getting all sentimental. She had this way of cutting through the noise and telling it like it is. But I know one thing she’d agree with: she’d want us to keep moving forward. To honor her memory by living fully and helping others do the same.

So, let’s make a promise—to ourselves, to each other, and to Emille. Let’s promise to reach out. To check in. To show up, even when it feels uncomfortable. Because the truth is, none of us knows how much time we have left. None of us knows which conversation might be our last. So why waste a single moment?

—

### **Your Call to Action**
Right now, as you read this, I want you to stop scrolling. Put down your phone. Think of someone in your life who’s hurting. Maybe they’ve lost a loved one. Maybe they’re battling illness, heartbreak, or loneliness. Whatever it is, they need you. They may never ask for help directly—that’s not how pride works—but they need you all the same.

Reach out. Text them. Call them. Visit them. Bring them food. Listen to them cry. Laugh with them. Do *something*. Because here’s the cold, hard truth: you won’t regret showing up for someone. But you sure as hell will regret staying silent.

Emille taught me a lot during her time on this earth, but perhaps her greatest lesson was this: relationships matter. People matter. Showing up matters. And if I can leave you with one takeaway from this Slaylebrity post, let it be this: don’t wait until it’s too late to show someone you care. Start today. Start now.

Rest easy, Emille. Your legacy lives on—not just in the memories we share, but in the actions we take because of you.

—

To everyone reading this: go be the person who makes a difference. Be the reason someone smiles today. Be the shoulder someone leans on. Be the proof that even in the darkest times, there’s still light.

And remember—you’ve got this.

HOW TO CONSULT WITH ME?
Rates: $100 | 30 minute
How to book WhatsApp Tobenna: +234 916 560 3656

DOWNLOAD PINKY PROF CV

Contact sales@slaynetwork.co.uk and include referred by PinkyProf in your subject, to join Slaylebrity VIP social network

You can join, me in Special Sessions of mindfulness worship & Mentorship Sit Outs, by joining ‘The Living By Design Nation, Daily activities!
Just Click to join our Daily LIVING LIFE BY DESIGN programs on Zoom!
👇👇👇👇👇👇👇
http://bit.ly/lbdwarroom
OR
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/85079858028?pwd=dThLSmN3MXRLUUU4VDB0UkJJWENFQT09

Zoom ID: 850 7985 8028
Password: ZionLBD
Time: 4am to 6am daily
[WHY SO EARLY; 1)To accommodate other time zones, as we have a global community of over 600 professionals & Artisans,
3) it’s convenient Night time for some, & after work for others, & 4) for us In Nigeria, it’s early enough, not to interfere with other engagements!]

RSVP
Emeritus Professor Ifeoma Okoye
PROVOST GENERAL OF THE LIVING BY DESIGN INSTITUTE [LBDI]
And If interested in registering for our Colleges & Academy, dial the LBD Institute contact number: +2348065471098, for inquiries!