*YOU ASK HOW YOUR FLOWERS LOOK? LET ME WATER THEM WITH YOUR TEARS, SNOWFLAKE.**

Listen here, Botanic Beta. You’re out here pruning pansies, snapping pics of petunias, and begging for validation like a medieval peasant presenting turnips to the king. “How do my flowers look?” **Pathetic.** Let me tell you exactly what I think before you mulch your self-esteem.

—

### **1. YOUR GARDEN IS A GRAVEYARD FOR AMBITION.**
You’re tending tulips while real Slaylebrity men and women are building empires. Let’s break down this floral fiasco:
– **Flowers are for funerals and SIMPS.** Winners plant money trees.
– **Your roses can’t pay bills.** My Bugattis? They *print* bills.
– **You think nurturing petals is “peaceful.”** I think it’s a cry for fatherhood.

Your garden isn’t “serene” — it’s a shrine to your weakness.

—

### **2. YOU’RE COSPLAYING A PEASANT — AND IT’S EMBARRASSING.**
Real talk? Your lilies look like they’re begging for euthanasia. Meanwhile, I’m out here landscaping with private jets and superyacht marinas. Let’s dig deeper:
– **Your “green thumb” is code for “no purpose.”** My thumb? Crushing throats in the octagon.
– **You talk to plants because people ignore you.** I talk to CEOs — they answer.
– **Your fertilizer is cope.** My fertilizer? The ashes of competitors.

Your daisies won’t save you when life stomps through your greenhouse like Godzilla.

—

### **3. NATURE IS FOR HUNTING — NOT HUGGING.**
You think Mother Earth wants your dandelion diorama? Wrong. Nature respects predators, not gardeners. Let’s root out the truth:
– **Lions don’t stop to smell roses.** They eat the animals that do.
– **Survival of the fittest > your compost heap.**
– **You’re arranging chrysanthemums while I’m arranging mergers.**

The only bouquet you need is CASH ROSES — and you can’t afford them.

—

### **4. YOUR FLOWERS SMELL LIKE DESPERATION.**
Let’s get floral-frank. That garden? It’s a neon sign screaming:
– **“I’ve given up on greatness!”**
– **“I peaked in kindergarten finger-painting!”**
– **“My testosterone left with my hairline!”**

You want me to compliment your pansies? Here’s one: **They’re as vibrant as your future isn’t.**

—

### **5. HERE’S HOW TO FIX YOUR GARDEN (AND YOUR LIFE):**
1. **Salt the earth.** Kill every weak, pastel-petaled parasite.
2. **Plant ambition.** Water it with sweat. Fertilize with haters.
3. **Harvest power.** Trade vases for vaults.

Turn your greenhouse into a warhouse.

—

### **BLOOM OR BE BURIED.**
The world doesn’t need more daffodils. It needs **DRAGONS**.

So burn your garden gloves. Torch the tulips. And come back when you’ve grown something worth respecting — like a Fortune 500 company or diamond-crusted cojones.

**– VICTORIA FOX**

*PS: Still holding the watering can? Pathetic. Send me your location — I’ll park a Bugatti on your begonias.* 💀🌹🚗

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