All I do is figure out how to do crazy things
I flipped through page after delicious page, looking for our next meal. There were so many menu options, I didn’t know how I was ever going to choose something. Mark and I have huge appetites, so we’re always on the lookout for something to satisfy us…to fill us up.
Then, after enjoying a visual smorgasbord that never seemed to end, something incredible caught my eye, and stopped my hands in their tracks.
“Holy shit! This is amazing!” I said, grabbing Mark’s exposed bicep and taking a moment to squeeze it in loving admiration.
“What is it, Magpie?”
“An adult film company is having open auditions for new talent!”
“What?”
“We can audition to be in adult films! Wouldn’t that be awesome?”
“I thought you were looking at the swingers’ magazine to find us some new talent?”
“Well, I was. There are just so many choices, I don’t know how I’m going to decide who to contact. This ad just jumped out at me.”
“Maggie, we’ve never even done a sex tape together and you want us to be in pornos for the world to see?”
“Why not?”
“Because the world will see it…and by the world, I mean our respective spouses.”
“You have no problem showing off our wares to the sex club.”
“Do you really think that your husband and my wife would have anything to do with a sex club?”
“I don’t see them watching porn either quite frankly.”
“I don’t know. Don’t you think we’re already pressing our luck with this affair?”
“No, I don’t. If they haven’t found out about us by now, I can’t imagine they ever will. That’s not really the point though.”
“What is the point?”
“It’s something new and different. And we like new and different.”
“I can’t deny that. But still — ”
“Don’t you want the opportunity to show off your special talents in front of a huge audience? It would take our act to the next level.”
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Don’t worry your escapades are safe with us.
All I do is figure out how to do crazy things
